How do you know when you're in the wrong place? I still feel that I am far from thriving. My writing's getting terrible, I can't find the right words to use, and my phrasing feels imprecise and clumsy all the time. I am surrounded daily by this cloud of Eh and it does not depart me, neither does this sense of Not Belonging Anywhere, but I can cope with that because I was never quite bothered by it anyway.
The realisation that you have little motivation to carry on living is a very scary thought. It's just that periodically, one goes Oh well here I am, I can't change the fact that I persist in my existence, but whatever for, and decides to take a day off to spend some time being quiet and to simply pause.
Weirdly, something struck me while typing that previous sentence. I think I need some form of retreat, because everything's Promo-centric now and I just need to stop and spend an entire day reading God's word and being close to the single definite constant in my life.
No comments:
Post a Comment