you-are-laughing-because-my-nose-truly-is-big-and-i-scare-babies

IFUCKINGHATEIPODSNATCHER:YOUSUCKYOUSUCKYOUSUCKKKKKKKEURGH!!!

okay. phew. I feel sort of better.

NOT.

I've realized my ipod mini is gone. like, you know, sudden realization, aftershocks, etc. etc.

they say it's a psychological thing. GAWD. I'm SO MAD. ARGH. GNASH TEETH.

*trembles*

right.

Oh actually i feel like upchucking because I've been through and seen disgusting human behaviour (which bores me, by the way) everywhere I went.

sometimes i think i'm too nice =like, nice as in, the kind that makes people take you for-granted and stuff?

and i have realized that when people say that 'oh my nose is not that big' they're just saying it and it's really my fault that I'm so bloody self-conscious and shallow enough to nickname myself after my biggest insecurity.

but I shouldn't be angry at them. Really. They're trying to be nice to whiny-whiny me who is, in fact, a sad loser who looks like a FREAK and starts feeling like a bad emo-rock song when I lament my bitter fate of existance on cruel soil.

i hate my hair.

(hmm. ihatemyhair@hotmail.com? theonewiththestupidhair@hotmail.com? myhairwillalwayssuckforeverandeveramen@hotmail.com?)

PEACHYCLEAN=D

Singing praises of exfoliating products
Originally uploaded by theonewiththebignose.

Yeah so this is what I rub into my face every morning and afternoon. x)

The tube looks different now actually.
Sort of more 'earthly/nature chic' rather than 'summer fun chic'.


(sort of)
(whatever)

When I tried to brush away ennui.

TASK: Open iTunes/iPod or Windows Media Player to answer the following. Go to your library. Answer, no matter how embarrasing it is.

MY ANSWERS:

How many songs?:
1784

Sort by song title:
First Song: "...Baby One More Time" by Britney Spears
Last Song: "シェリーにくちづけ" by Pizzicato Five

Sort by time:
Shortest Song: Tie — "Waltz #1", Sam Phillips cues from Gilmore Girls (0:14)
Longest Song: "Beatabix's Lemon Jelly Companion" (57 mins 55 secs)

Sort by album:
First Album: "...Baby One More Time" by Britney Spears
Last Album: "You Are Free" by Cat Power

Top Five Most Played Songs:
1. "I Don't Mind" by Slumber Party
2. "Air" by Slumber Party
3. "Strawberry Sunday" by Slumber Party
4. "There She Goes" by Sixpence None The Richer
5. "99 Luftballons" by Nena

First song that comes up on Shuffle:
"Prototype" by Outkast

How many songs come up when you search for "sex"?
None =P

How many songs come up when you search for "death"?
2 - "Once Upon a Time - The Battle for Life and Death" by Good Charlotte and "A Lack Of Color" By Death Cab For Cutie

How many songs come up when you search for "love"? 103

How many songs come up when you search for "you"? 133

you-are-laughing-because-my-face-cream-is-actually-squished-banana

OHMYGOSHHH

How on earth did we manage to FINALLY win debates?

So at first for the first debate, we actually won KC with a 'unanimous' decision. YAY
Then the next match, we were so SUI because they paired us up with National Junior College IP Programme, and we LOST . Anyway it was quite expected. heeeh.
I'm not sure what happened to me during the third round against MGS and I totally ucked up during my speech and i was SO horrified because my screw-up kinda affected Ming Ting too. =x or what?
Anyway we don't know the EXACT results of the 4th match against KC, but we managed to jolt back to reality and we have a high chance of winning KC ^^

YAYNESS =D

*is actually happy*

A tree grows as we debate

OMG

I'll be at Victoria School in about 10 hours' time from now, worried as heck.

I'll be at a debate tournament at Victoria School in about 12 hours' time from now, worried as heck, stuttering slightly as I debate.

I'll be at a debate tournament at Victoria School in about 14 hours' time from now, worried as heck, stuttering slightly as I debate, having an extreme case of Arghness because I have to go through TWO more rounds of competition.

I'll be at a debate tournament at Victoria School in about 16 hours' time from now, worried as heck, stuttering slightly as I debate, having an extreme case of Arghness because I have to go through TWO more rounds of competition, debating for the second time, having an extreme case of Arghness because I have to go through one more round of competition.

I'll be at a debate tournament at Victoria School in about 18 hours' time from now, worried as heck, stuttering slightly as I debate, having an extreme case of Arghness because I have to go through TWO more rounds of competition, debating for the second time, having an extreme case of Arghness because I have to go through one more round of competition, finished the last round of debate and feeling sorta happy because everything is over and done with.

OMG

Listens to French electronic music and drinks unsweetened coffee as a form of therapy

It's is 3 a.m. and raining outside. He sits near his computer, typing. It rains harder and the temperature dropps still. The chill becomes the cold that ate through flesh and twisted the bones, as if splinters from a fallen twig. He stands up and reaches for his black sweater knitted on a starry night by his grandmother as he, small and frail, slept on a burgundy velvet cushion by Granny's woolen skirt and by the warm crackling log fire as the autumn breeze swept through the grass, its soft rustle a lullabye nodding him off to sleep.
There is a knock on the dorr; 3 or 4 sharp rapps on the oak veneer.
The black sweater hugging his thin figure, he walks down to answer the door, violet mug of coffee in his hand.
He pulls the door open. The gust of cold, harsh wind temporarily blinds him. Above the tiny log cottage, the cresent moon smiles alone over the green hills dulled by lack of sunlight. A red balloon floats dreamily into the starry blanket of night sky, disappearing into the wispiness of moonlight. It seems to have stopped raining.

The smoothest way is full of stones

Hmmm
After look through my blog for like, the 35th time, i've realized everything i write sounds childish, shallow and immature. How sad.

So I promised myself today that I will blog about my inner battles with raging emotions (ergo: insatiable frustrating anger at having nothing and wanting everything), my views on social frivolities (ergo: talking non-stop, laughing at stock jokes) and the amazing miraculous ability of mine to tolerate such unimportant noise and sounds.

I attended as nice happy social function today. Actually it was a... wedding! So here is a sequence of events:
1) Complain to my sister that my hair is not stylable at all.
2) Tried styling hair for anout an hour.
3) Gives up; hair remains the same as before.
4) Arrives at wedding, realizes to one's horror that one has totaly forgotten to apply at least some fragrance and wear watch to complement style, and looks very under-dressed.
5) Looks around some more and notices that everyones hair is slick, trendy and stylish and therefore they are stylish; one is unstylish due to lack of hair management.
6) Wedding ceremony. Rating: ∞ out of 10 – couple is happy and both have relatively cool parents. =D
7) Refreshments. Sister and I walk around pretending to be busy, thus avoiding conversation with people that usually ask the same questions and try to sound funny.

Me: *replying an sms*
Man that i happen to know: Wah! Playing handphone games ar?
Me: No I'm not
Man that I happen to know: *doesn't appear to have heard* Oh? Esther doesn't have? Let her play la!
Esther: *appears to be thinking: oh you just HAVE to poke and prod into my bitter insecurities?* *expression: -_-*
Me: I'm SMS-ing!
Man that i happen to know: huh? sms-ing girlfriend ar? Well done! (or something like that)
Me: *appears to be shouting: OHSHUDDUPSHUDDUPSHUDDUPYOU'REMAKINGMELONGTOTHROWMYPLATEOFBEEHOONANDBEEFSLICESINTOYOURFACEJUSTTOWIPEOFFTHATSATISFIEDSMIRKFROMYOURFACE*

All this goes on while Sister eavesdrops on womens' conversation. ('Oh! So his birthday is on blah-and-blah', 'oh come here come here she needs some help', 'wow i like your dress! so elegant, ar?' etc. etc.')

Of course I have to have a mindset that since this was a wedding and everything is supposed to be happy, everyone should be engaged such frivolities as a form of celebration of the sacredness and sanctity of marriage and a promise that two lovers make in front of God and to proclaim his love and holiness etc. in the form of marriage.

yeah

and anyway I have noticed that everyone loves a relative from a school like RI ('Oh, he's in RI *beams*') or RGS ('yeah I'm in RGS *beams*) or Chinese High ('Oh all my sons studied in Chinese High *beams*) or wadeva. But mention something like this...

Kid: Oh..I'm studying at x*nm*n =D
Adult prying into kid's life like unstitching a rag doll and inspecting the density of the wool, finding out the gravitational pull the doll exerts etc. etc. : Oh... x*nm*n... that's the one at hougang right?
Kid: yes
Adult prying into kid's life like unstitching a rag doll and inspecting the density of the wool, finding out the gravitational pull the doll exerts etc. etc. : ohh... *disappointed* Don't give up! You can try harder in the O levels! blahblahcrapoutsomeinspirationalquoteblahblahblah !
Kid: *Thinks: this guy is strange?*

So, unfortunately, we have to face being labelled as students in a neighbourhood school that just so happens to overachieve alot.

Another major thing I've decided this week.
Once I graduate from secondary school, like my senior Elizabeth, I'm gonna apply for admission into the LaSalle-SIA college of the arts. =D Why didn't i think of that earlier? I'm just afraid my dream will come crashing down when I see my rejection slip that *might* appear (because I'm a person that somehow attracts a negative and unfortunate series of events that will harm my self-esteem) and I start to hear nasty things about the college and when they give me a second chance, I will grudgingly accept but turn them down once I become too influenced by what I hear. But as usual, in the end, all turns out well and everyone is happy. IMHO, life kinda rocks in this aspect.

All of a sudden, the thought and reminiscence of rejection makes me weary of this world and the fickleness of my mind. Is the smoothest way indeed a path full of stones?