Today was fun. There was playmax and the debaters came, and I've finally bought a new wallet and bag.
Anyway, you know what? I'm gonna use my humanities scholarship to buy expensive 7 For All Mankind jeans because I'm such a rebel wow.
Or maybe not.
I actually thought I could muster enough energy to get all pending tasks done by today (send emails that should have been sent weeks ago, check on things that I should be checking on more often), but I can't find the zen in accepting defeat to a malignant and omnipresent to-do list.
Coupled with the fact that I'm losing patience with many things at home that I'm still trying to love and accept, I think the dark ages have descended upon me and will continue to cramp my sense of being. And perhaps I shall go mad.
And like every single time this happens I'm trying to find God in the darkness again, but sometimes it feels little more than a momentary high before everything starts overwhelming me again. Maybe I'm just of very little faith, and would like to think so too. It's that often talked-about struggle that people mention all the time, but then again, doesn't life propel itself through a cycle of struggling and healing?
Anyway I'm glad to feel as if I'm back home again. No one will ever understand how much I loathe Bedok.
Plus, something in my nose has been bleeding for the past week. I hope it's nothing too serious.
And I can't seem to point out what it is, but I'm reminded of Miss Havisham.
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